(no subject)
Mar. 6th, 2019 10:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
majestic_duxkI think what I miss most about tumblr, is that people actually interacted with me.
I try - I try so hard! - in these other forums, but I have always given out much more than I get back (like comments... *squinty eyes*). On the whole it's not a big deal - it's really not! Or at least... it only is when I am feeling bad anyway. On line has this way of making people, or if we are being specific, me feel invisible.
That is kind of my biggest issue in real life - to feel invisible, boring, unheard.
*ponders*
Anyway, the point of that is I am back to trying to be more engaged again. Maybe some of the problem is I have spread myself so thin. Dreamwidth, LJ, Twitter, Pillowfort, Discord... each taking up time and space. And trying to do them all means I do none.
The thing is, there are some people I only talk to one *one* of those. And I lost enough people when I dropped tumblr. Do I really want to do it again? (actually and FB and email. I can think of two fandom friends I only have on email). siiiiiiiiiiiigh.
Obviously I am feeling low. Some of it is the job search. It's demoralising. So demoralising. All I want to do is stay up late and sleep the day away, but then when I get up late (even if late is 9am or 10am) I feel like I have lost the whole day, because I am actually a morning person.
I am also struggling with writing - this has always been an issue actually, because my writing brain switches on about 10.30pm which is when I actually want to be in bed. Because I need to get up in the morning. *sighs* it's not the only reason I am not getting any writing done, but it is part of it.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow the power is off from 8.30 til 12.30. SO I will walk to where I can drop my compost off (even though I didn't go to the other place today. Just... a 30min walk in each direction is so far, especially when it is raining). So I will go to the place I know, then go and get snacks, and then come home and since I have no internet it will be hard to get sidetracked by things like how to americans pronounce buoy.
I joined skillshare (let me know if you want a code for two free months, or a link) because I desperately want to try acrylic pouring, but what I actually think is going to happen is I will wait until I go home because I don't want to buy a blowtorch just for that. Although if they run a class I will totally sign up. TOTALLY. Ok I got sidetracked - which is half the problem you know. I have so many things I want to do, and I am getting NONE of them done.
ugh.
ok I am just wasting time instead of going to bed. Hope you are all doing well.
Here's hoping tomorrow is positive and (for me) filled with one completed job application and many words.
I try - I try so hard! - in these other forums, but I have always given out much more than I get back (like comments... *squinty eyes*). On the whole it's not a big deal - it's really not! Or at least... it only is when I am feeling bad anyway. On line has this way of making people, or if we are being specific, me feel invisible.
That is kind of my biggest issue in real life - to feel invisible, boring, unheard.
*ponders*
Anyway, the point of that is I am back to trying to be more engaged again. Maybe some of the problem is I have spread myself so thin. Dreamwidth, LJ, Twitter, Pillowfort, Discord... each taking up time and space. And trying to do them all means I do none.
The thing is, there are some people I only talk to one *one* of those. And I lost enough people when I dropped tumblr. Do I really want to do it again? (actually and FB and email. I can think of two fandom friends I only have on email). siiiiiiiiiiiigh.
Obviously I am feeling low. Some of it is the job search. It's demoralising. So demoralising. All I want to do is stay up late and sleep the day away, but then when I get up late (even if late is 9am or 10am) I feel like I have lost the whole day, because I am actually a morning person.
I am also struggling with writing - this has always been an issue actually, because my writing brain switches on about 10.30pm which is when I actually want to be in bed. Because I need to get up in the morning. *sighs* it's not the only reason I am not getting any writing done, but it is part of it.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow the power is off from 8.30 til 12.30. SO I will walk to where I can drop my compost off (even though I didn't go to the other place today. Just... a 30min walk in each direction is so far, especially when it is raining). So I will go to the place I know, then go and get snacks, and then come home and since I have no internet it will be hard to get sidetracked by things like how to americans pronounce buoy.
I joined skillshare (let me know if you want a code for two free months, or a link) because I desperately want to try acrylic pouring, but what I actually think is going to happen is I will wait until I go home because I don't want to buy a blowtorch just for that. Although if they run a class I will totally sign up. TOTALLY. Ok I got sidetracked - which is half the problem you know. I have so many things I want to do, and I am getting NONE of them done.
ugh.
ok I am just wasting time instead of going to bed. Hope you are all doing well.
Here's hoping tomorrow is positive and (for me) filled with one completed job application and many words.
